Its scary how much things have changed in the past one year. Was talking to J before bed a few nights back and we're both agreeable that its time to take a step forward for both business and relationship. Expansion is coming in the near future for Kinsmen and we're going to BTO for a flat soon omgggg. So surreal but its all happening.
Differences are already rising towards our goal for the business but its inevitable and I'm glad we are able to talk things thru amicably. That 2 hours talk was so worth it :)
Marriage, Kinsmen and family business is actually all I think about now.(Okay, studies too)
I know my route ends with returning to the family business and helping my dad but lucky I am to be able to do something I love before reality hits.
Can't wait to see what does my life have in store for me yay.
Love,
Yi Ling x.
Monday 17 August 2015
Tuesday 10 March 2015
..
Its 11.41am and I'm wide awake from the flat white and cold brew from Symmetry offered by Chris, their talented barista. Been sleeping really little these few days for no apparent reason whereas J has been sleeping wayyyyyy too much. I guess he's returning his sleep debt for those insomnia nights while i'm in Korea HAHA.
Its been a 4 days since I've came back from Korea and its the first night J isn't here and i want him hereeeee T.T It isn't that i'm needy(its true), i just love having him here and falling asleep in his arms :') What's even better is both my parents are so approving of him and they've given the green lights for him to stay over and sleep in my room, YAY! He's the first too heehee ^^
I've been doing a lot of thinking recently about how i said this love i have with J is milder than the previous. Oh how i was soooooo wrong. It isn't milder, i guess i grew up and learnt how to control my emotions MUCH better and only allow them to flow when i want it to(most of the times haha). You know how some people makes you wanna be mature for them, grow up for them or even be a better person for them because you know they deserve it? J does that to me.
He deserves so much more love and care for the person he is.
I'm gonna admit something i did secretly behind his back a few days back and i hope he wouldn't be unhappy if he sees this.
I was stalking his Facebook timeline and few days back when i had insomnia and after reading all of it, i was hungry for more informations about his past. He is one that seldom gives details about his past because of the way he is unless i probe further which i don't really do. Therefore, it led me to his private twitter account which no one knew about and i "hacked" into it. ACTUALLY IT ISN'T REALLY HACKING BECAUSE I KNOW HIS PASSWORD*DEFENSIVE MODE ON* HAHA.
But alright, if you're reading this, I'M SORRY BABY HEEHEE YOU KNOW I LOVE YOU :*
So, i went on reading through his tweets about his past blah blah blah and i felt i was in it. I empathised, i pity, i shared, i felt for him and i ended up tearing as i read on. I wanted to be there for him, i wanted to hug him and assure him its a passing phase and all is good. I wanted to be there to let him know how much i understand what he's been through because i had the same experiences and i would be his listening ear.
I understand his pain and i want to protect him with all i have.
It was like a younger J opening up to me about his insecurities and pain. Something the now J, wouldn't have. I know J is a mature adult, i know how much of a man he is but sometimes, i wanna be here or there, idk lol. I feel that such emotional connections would help forge a deeper bond between us. He makes me wanna give him my everything, do all the little changes i should do to grow up and be the woman he wants to marry.(He does already actually :DDDD) I see him as someone i can lean on, go to when i'm trouble and know that he will be there no matter what. Yet, i want to be a strong woman for him. I want him to know that i'll always have his back and he's free to venture out, strive to build a future for us and there's always a place called home for him at the end of the day.
I love him, so so so much and I do hope our paths never stop crossing.
Love,
Yi Ling x.
Its been a 4 days since I've came back from Korea and its the first night J isn't here and i want him hereeeee T.T It isn't that i'm needy(its true), i just love having him here and falling asleep in his arms :') What's even better is both my parents are so approving of him and they've given the green lights for him to stay over and sleep in my room, YAY! He's the first too heehee ^^
I've been doing a lot of thinking recently about how i said this love i have with J is milder than the previous. Oh how i was soooooo wrong. It isn't milder, i guess i grew up and learnt how to control my emotions MUCH better and only allow them to flow when i want it to(most of the times haha). You know how some people makes you wanna be mature for them, grow up for them or even be a better person for them because you know they deserve it? J does that to me.
He deserves so much more love and care for the person he is.
I'm gonna admit something i did secretly behind his back a few days back and i hope he wouldn't be unhappy if he sees this.
I was stalking his Facebook timeline and few days back when i had insomnia and after reading all of it, i was hungry for more informations about his past. He is one that seldom gives details about his past because of the way he is unless i probe further which i don't really do. Therefore, it led me to his private twitter account which no one knew about and i "hacked" into it. ACTUALLY IT ISN'T REALLY HACKING BECAUSE I KNOW HIS PASSWORD*DEFENSIVE MODE ON* HAHA.
But alright, if you're reading this, I'M SORRY BABY HEEHEE YOU KNOW I LOVE YOU :*
So, i went on reading through his tweets about his past blah blah blah and i felt i was in it. I empathised, i pity, i shared, i felt for him and i ended up tearing as i read on. I wanted to be there for him, i wanted to hug him and assure him its a passing phase and all is good. I wanted to be there to let him know how much i understand what he's been through because i had the same experiences and i would be his listening ear.
I understand his pain and i want to protect him with all i have.
It was like a younger J opening up to me about his insecurities and pain. Something the now J, wouldn't have. I know J is a mature adult, i know how much of a man he is but sometimes, i wanna be here or there, idk lol. I feel that such emotional connections would help forge a deeper bond between us. He makes me wanna give him my everything, do all the little changes i should do to grow up and be the woman he wants to marry.(He does already actually :DDDD) I see him as someone i can lean on, go to when i'm trouble and know that he will be there no matter what. Yet, i want to be a strong woman for him. I want him to know that i'll always have his back and he's free to venture out, strive to build a future for us and there's always a place called home for him at the end of the day.
I love him, so so so much and I do hope our paths never stop crossing.
Love,
Yi Ling x.
Thursday 25 September 2014
.
Love.
It comes to you in many different ways, different types and you often get a different kind of feeling especially when you're in love with different people.
At the start of my relationship with J, i've asked myself this question countless of times "Do i really love him? Why is this feeling so different from what i had with S?" But of course, it took me soon enough to realise the difference. What i had with S, it was an obsession that tore me apart. An obsession of wanting his love so much that I've lost myself along the way. Maybe its him, maybe its me or maybe its just us, that very relationship was fated to be doomed the very night i said yes. I was madly in love and yes, i doubt i'll love anyone like i've loved S ever again. That love was too draining, it sucked most of me and whatever i had left was that hollow empty shell. It was irresistible, strong yet unhealthy.
This love for J, it came a little milder. It isn't that i don't love him as much, i guess i've learnt how to hold back a little love for myself. I've learnt to love myself before i could give J all that i have. J makes me happy, much happier. I go to bed everyday these past few months with a smile on face and wake up hearing his voice or seeing his messages because he makes it a point to end and begin each day with each other.(That, makes every single girl out there feel appreciated and it just shows he really do care about you) I don't have to fight for his attention like i did with S because his attention will always be on be. Despite having a part-time job, completing his degree and building up his very own business all at once, he makes it a point to never neglect me. And that, i am really grateful. I'm still a little needy here and there but i don't go crazy and start feeling a thousand insecure shit thoughts inside my head if i see him on whatsapp but he's not replying me or him not replying me ASAP. I guess i can only say J gives me security. He gives me enough love and tender care to secure my fragile heart yet gives me enough space to grow as a woman. I cannot be more thankful for that.
Its true how people always say that feelings isn't everything. Some people may be suitable for you and will bring out the best in you and the unsuitable ones will only bring out the worst in you.
S once told me that i will, one fine day, thank him for letting me go because he knows its for the best. I'm gonna thank him not for that but for leaving me at my most vulnerable and leaving me to fend for myself despite my pleas then to not do that. All that he has done made me more appreciative of everything J has done/is doing.
And this love i have with J, its fitting and it makes me feel whole.
Love,
Yi Ling x
It comes to you in many different ways, different types and you often get a different kind of feeling especially when you're in love with different people.
At the start of my relationship with J, i've asked myself this question countless of times "Do i really love him? Why is this feeling so different from what i had with S?" But of course, it took me soon enough to realise the difference. What i had with S, it was an obsession that tore me apart. An obsession of wanting his love so much that I've lost myself along the way. Maybe its him, maybe its me or maybe its just us, that very relationship was fated to be doomed the very night i said yes. I was madly in love and yes, i doubt i'll love anyone like i've loved S ever again. That love was too draining, it sucked most of me and whatever i had left was that hollow empty shell. It was irresistible, strong yet unhealthy.
This love for J, it came a little milder. It isn't that i don't love him as much, i guess i've learnt how to hold back a little love for myself. I've learnt to love myself before i could give J all that i have. J makes me happy, much happier. I go to bed everyday these past few months with a smile on face and wake up hearing his voice or seeing his messages because he makes it a point to end and begin each day with each other.(That, makes every single girl out there feel appreciated and it just shows he really do care about you) I don't have to fight for his attention like i did with S because his attention will always be on be. Despite having a part-time job, completing his degree and building up his very own business all at once, he makes it a point to never neglect me. And that, i am really grateful. I'm still a little needy here and there but i don't go crazy and start feeling a thousand insecure shit thoughts inside my head if i see him on whatsapp but he's not replying me or him not replying me ASAP. I guess i can only say J gives me security. He gives me enough love and tender care to secure my fragile heart yet gives me enough space to grow as a woman. I cannot be more thankful for that.
Its true how people always say that feelings isn't everything. Some people may be suitable for you and will bring out the best in you and the unsuitable ones will only bring out the worst in you.
S once told me that i will, one fine day, thank him for letting me go because he knows its for the best. I'm gonna thank him not for that but for leaving me at my most vulnerable and leaving me to fend for myself despite my pleas then to not do that. All that he has done made me more appreciative of everything J has done/is doing.
And this love i have with J, its fitting and it makes me feel whole.
Love,
Yi Ling x
Friday 11 July 2014
Bintan'14
Went for a short 2D1N trip with the bimbo and it was such a relaxing one. Really enjoyed myself there :)
Love,
Yi Ling x.
All the water sports we played was definitely worth getting tanned for and stupid conversations we had throughout was what i really enjoyed. Yay to more trips like this :)
Now lets just let the pictures do the talking :))
Love,
Yi Ling x.
Saturday 28 June 2014
" I never meant to be clingy, emotional dependent or an emotional burden. I just had so much to give. " - Me
This says it all, all that i've tried expressing :
http://thoughtcatalog.com/kate-emily/2014/06/to-the-girls-who-are-emotionally-high-maintenance/
Love,
Yi Ling x.
This says it all, all that i've tried expressing :
http://thoughtcatalog.com/kate-emily/2014/06/to-the-girls-who-are-emotionally-high-maintenance/
Love,
Yi Ling x.
Thursday 26 June 2014
R.E.M.I.N.D.E.R.
This post is a reminder for myself to NEVER EVER (I REPEAT) N.E.V.E.R E.V.E.R bottoms up a single shot. Period.
No idiot(except for me) in this world ever gets a jab within the 2nd hour after downing a toast shot and having to cancel her first ever trip with her bff the next day. MAXIMUM GUILT PLUS ITCHINESS PLUS PAIN(BOTH SKIN & MONEY BECAUSE NO REFUND) 24/7 IS NO JOKE T.T
SIGH X101010101010101010101010 T.T
SO I REPEAT : FUTURE SNG YI LING YOU BETTER NOT DRINK ANYMORE EVEN IF ITS JUST A STUPID SHOT OKAY YOU DUMBDUMB NO MORE YOU HEAR ME !!!!!!!!!! :(
Love,
Yi Ling x.
No idiot(except for me) in this world ever gets a jab within the 2nd hour after downing a toast shot and having to cancel her first ever trip with her bff the next day. MAXIMUM GUILT PLUS ITCHINESS PLUS PAIN(BOTH SKIN & MONEY BECAUSE NO REFUND) 24/7 IS NO JOKE T.T
SIGH X101010101010101010101010 T.T
SO I REPEAT : FUTURE SNG YI LING YOU BETTER NOT DRINK ANYMORE EVEN IF ITS JUST A STUPID SHOT OKAY YOU DUMBDUMB NO MORE YOU HEAR ME !!!!!!!!!! :(
Love,
Yi Ling x.
Monday 23 June 2014
Updates
Been so so so busy these few weeks i don't even have the time for much rest. It was crazy too. Did lots of things i wouldn't normally do. Been catching only about an average of 6 hours of sleep a day and for anyone who knows me, will know that that is a RIDICULOUSLY little amount of sleep. Butttttt today, i slept for 18 hours straight heehee ^^ Shows how tired i was.
Hongkong this time was really good because my bestf came along and i made a new friend there. Coffee sure do bring people together :) Too many pictures to upload but i am really happy SJ came along this time THANK YOU IF YOU'RE SEEING THIS. <3
Oh and can i add how freaked out i am by how well my cousin knows me!?!?!?!?!?!?!? :O There were little traces(or none) of evidence but she still managed to find out about something. Something i've been hiding to myself for about 9 months. Sigh family i say <3
Oh oh and one more, I THINK BUTTER FACTORY IS SO MUCH BETTER THAN ZOUK HELLO????? Hahaha okay just me being biased. Prefer the atmosphere/music/people there :)
Alright, its BBQ with the Yahava-ians at my place tml and then Bintan on Wednesday heehee. I love my life ^^
Goodbye earthlings, for now :)
Love,
Yi Ling x.
Maybe, just maybe, i've already been waiting all along.
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